Well…not really die, but it’s my favorite Lady Gaga song, and an appropriate title for how I feel right now.
So as you may know, if you’ve been following this whole debacle of my life, my job isn’t going to give me a raise. Sad and defeated, I had one last meeting with them. For the last time, I laid everything out on the line. In between tears, I blurted, “I just need a break! I just need a month off to get it together. I haven’t had a break in over 2 years since I graduated college.”
As soon as the words flew out of my mouth, I just knew I had made a mistake. They weren’t going to give me a raise, how in the world would they give me a month off from work? The next words completely stunned me.
“You know what….that isn’t such a bad idea.”
WHAT?! Once I caught my breath, I looked at my bosses with wide eyes. They couldn’t be serious right? They told me they were going to talk it over, talk over all of the logistics and get back to me. Elated at the possibility I might get a month off from work, I skipped back to my desk and started dreaming up all of the things I could get done with a month off.
Yesterday, they brought me in to another meeting. I just thought they were going to deny my request, but they didn’t. They gave me a month off of work! A WHOLE MONTH. I don’t even know what to do with myself. I haven’t had a break since college. After I graduated, I moved to LA a week later, a week after that I found my first job, and it’s just gone downhill from there.
And it’s happening fast. My last day of work is this Friday. AHHHH!!!!!!! I just can’t even explain in words how happy I am. More than getting a break, I’m going to actually get healthy. My mental well being has completely suffered completely since I’ve been working at this desk. When you sit in front of a computer for 9 hours a day, it’s really hard to get your life together and figure out what you need to do or what you want to do. I can’t wait to get away and actually have free time, time to explore, time to play, learn, love and enjoy life. And of course, I’ll throw in some delicious traveling along the way. I want to go to Santa Barbara, Arizona, Las Vegas (before it’s a million degrees and completely unbearable).
Of course, they’ve told me if I don’t come back after this month, there won’t be any hard feelings. Who knows? After this month off, I could come back completely refreshed and looking at this industry with new eyes. But I have an inkling I won’t be making my way back, but instead beginning a new journey in my life. A new step, a new direction. I already feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.
I don’t know where the wind will blow me next, but I’m excited to start the ride.
I’m almost free.